The U. S.
Department of Education Announces Data-Driven Education News Channel, On Air
24/7
By Susan Ohanian
1:00 a.m. Consonant
Crisis
Special panel
Prof. Timothy Shanahan
reports dismal national scores, “U.S. Ranks 83rd in Consonant Blends”
Lou Dobbs says “I told
you so—it’s the illegal immigrants pulling us down.”
George Miller promises
to name special task force to investigate, names Texas certified public accountant Norma
Garza chair
Larry King hosts
call-ins
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3: 00 A.M. NCTE and IRA Executive Directors Display Their Seats at the Table Professional leaders will be joined by NEA lobbyist Joel Packard. Al Shanker's ghost is expected to make a special appearance.
4: 00 A.M.
Homeland Security Phonemic Awareness Test Act Now mandatoryfor all airline travelers, should frequent
flier hardship exclusion be allowed? President of the Business Roundtable says "Yes!"
5:00 A. M. What Ignorant, Abusive, Lazy, Overpaid Teachers Don't Want you to Know
Arne Duncan explains the 6,849 classroom practices he wants public school teachers to eliminate.
7 a.m. What makes an Economy
Grow? PHONICS.
Business Roundtable releases
special report funded by McGraw-Hill. Approximately 80% of the human race lives
in phonics poverty. Roughly one billion live on fewer than five short vowels a
day. According to co-authors of this powerful new study, the good news is that
the plan of action for scientific, data-driven relief is clear.
8 a.m. Congressional Breakfast
"The family that sounds out
together, stays together," advises Filip
A. Fillips, founder of Up With Phonics!, at the first annual Phonemic Awareness
Congressional Breakfast.
Arne Duncan, Al Sharpton, and Newt Gingrich slated to sing the Alphabet Song
10.00 a.m. Senate Stalemate
Schwa Compromise fails in the
senate. Will the Democrats pay a political price? Geraldo reacts.
11:00 a.m. Is your child's college at risk from professional terrorists?
Dr.Bill O'Reilly offers a shocking report on professorial terrorism: "Stifling Vowel Digraphs on Campus"
12.00 NoonPhonics First
Dr. Laura takes on secularists,
feminists, gay marriage advocates, and illegal aliens whose aim is to bring
down Up With Phonics! Order your Autographed
Copy of 10 Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Short Vowelshere.
1:00 p.m. Pre-Natal Phonics Acquisition
Yale researchers offer program for preventing dyslexia.
PAID PROGRAMMING
Vowel Voice Stay informed! Daily e-mail updates. Send us your questions.
vowelvoice.gov
3.00 P. M. Is Your Child's School Safe from Embedded Modifiers? Agents
from the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms & Umlauts provide safety tips.
4:00
p.m. UP CLOSE & PERSONAL
Chicago family without access to 16
rules for syllabification hit hard.
Hear their tragic story.Oprah
offers special plan for relief.
5:00 p.m.
Maury
Mon. Attack of the Phonics Wreckers!
Tues. Mom & 6 daughters swapped vowels with same 63-year-old lover!!
Wed. Phonics Tattoos: Fantastic Body Art!!!
Thurs. "I Faked 120 Phonics ActsTo Keep Hubby Happy"
Fri. Bi-phonics Revealed!!!!
6:00 NEWS
that Matters
NEWS BRIEFS:
Duncan
deniesthat Race to the Top calls for
National Guard to be called out to monitor lesson plans. Says he’s confident an
expanded Teach for America
corps can do the job.
AFT offers Minority Sentence-Diagrammer-of-Year
Award
·Professorial Terrorism: Stifling Vowel Digraphs
on Campus
·Phonics International Threat: The Singapore Story
·The Effects of Phonemic Intervention on At-Risk
Youth with an Aversion to Eggplant
Tom Clancy Speaks Out: "Why I’ll Pick Up a Gun for Phonics!"
7:00
p.m.Live at 7
Should every high school graduate
be required to demonstrate homograph proficiency? Meet one Fortune 500
executive who says Yes!.
8:00 p.m. Congressional Update
George Miller, Chair, House Committee on Education and Labor, explains why the
President must sign a free phonics agreement with Uruguay.
9:00 p.m. PBS
Spotlight: Lemuel Gets a Chance View the
heartwarming experience of six urban families and their Silent E experience.
10:00 p.m.NEIGHBORHOOD WATCH: Taking on Terror
It’s 10 o’clock. Do
you know where your family’s phonemes are?
Only YOU can keep our
community safe
11:00 p.m. PREMIER!
Daughters of American Dipthongs
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University of Oregon Enroll now.
Midnight: Phonics Prayer of the Day
PAID
ADVERTISEMENT: 12 steps to Phonics Renewal
Enroll now and receive free 17-blade blender plus the collected pronouncements
of Ms. Norma Garza, Texas
certified public accountant who served on the National Reading Panel. www.phonics.renewal.edu
12:30 a.m. PLANET
PHONICS
Interactive.
Get 15 hours a week of live
streaming video Must be 18 to participate.
planetphonics.gov
